Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The girls love the pool and want to swim all day. I love the fact that Emma did not hesitate this summer and got right into the water. She swims from one end of the pool to the other with her floaty of course. What a difference from last year! Shelby is our little fish. She jumps in, does hand stands, swims underwater, and loves her goggles. Thank goodness for the pool both at Grandma's in Jax and here in our neighborhood!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

My Sweet Amanda, 1985-2009

After 17 months of battling 2 types of cancer, Amanda went home to be with Jesus on May 30th and was put to rest Thursday, June 4, 2009. I attended her funeral and witnessed what no mother would ever want to experience. Her mom, Kim, was beyond devastation. How do you say good-bye? Even when you know that the body you can still see is no longer your child, your heart tears in two. I could see the pain ripping through her soul. I wanted to take it all away for her entire family. I watched as they all cried and grieved. I had Shelby and Emma with me so I tried to keep it together the best I could. I suppose that was a blessing to have them there. I had planned for them to stay with my mom but it did not work out. Had I been alone I think the tears would have flooded my face. I have so many memories of babysitting these kids. When I look at pictures of these precious girls and their brother, Chad, I remember so many fun times. I was with the 3 of them every Saturday night of high school, had them on weekends when their parents would go away and at times for vacations. I watched them over the summer and spent so many birthdays celebrating their lives. I guess I was a "nanny" before it was the thing to be. Amanda was precious to me and always had a smile filled with sunshine. Her eyes would make those little upside down smiles and her giggle would make you laugh. God had a plan for her life that we could never have predicted. I am thankful for God allowing me to see Amanda in April as part of His plan before she left us. He knew when she would take her last breath. I had no idea when I hugged her bye after we shopped and ate lunch that it would be the last time. But, I am SO incredibly glad I had that time. As I looked at her in her casket, I mourned her loss but was comforted by the fact that she will no longer be in pain, will no longer have swelling beyond recognition, will no longer be poked with needles, and will no longer have to fight to stay alive. She was tired. Rest now Manda girl. You are safe from harm forever more. I love you and will see you again some day.